Mei's place

Because one set of photos just wasn’t enough...

Wed, 22 Feb 2012 13:33:39 -0900

Because one set of photos just wasn’t enough today.

Double dose!

Kenya part 5.1

xo.

Kenya…Part 5! So I left off in the boma of...

Wed, 22 Feb 2012 13:23:02 -0900

Kenya…Part 5!

So I left off in the boma of dreams…

and the next day was full of packing, learning, listening, and then setting off into the bush!

Two groups. 6 cameras. 2 leaders of the day. 2 Maasai hikers. Me. And miles to go before we sleep (*Chuckle*)…

The landscape changes like the wind…first it is rolling grass hills and I stretch my eyes to see as far as I can see. I loosen my limbs and and try to settle into the hiker that lives inside my soul. I am so apart of this lifestyle that it feels like I am just visiting another home…the city girl in her hiking boots.

The students are following, but also leading…they are hiking fast to a destination they don’t know. They are trying to be supportive, trying not to show any weakness, trying to stay face even in a land that they have never adventured before.

I talk for miles with various students and leaders about their lives, who they are, what they love, why they are here, what kind of Kenya they want to live in…and they ask me about America, how many times I have ridden in a Mercedes (to which my answer was…none! and why would I want to!?), what my family is like, “You go to school to be an artist?!…this is your job?!” - if only they knew that I get asked that question when I am in the states more often than when I am in the Kenyan wilderness, how many airplanes did I fly in to get here?, who am I…

One of the biggest moments of that hiking day:
We are hiking in the mud and lush moss of the forest, I am trying to remember where my feet are and where to keep my center of balance (“Nose over your toes? Nose behind your toes?…”) The forest is deep and thick…it twists and turns while we walk along the elephant trails…we are visitors to this neighborhood and it is so apparent. I listen my breath in my ears and let my mind wonder.

One step at a time.

Then, as if we are walking along a block in some downtown area, our paths connect with a man walking the opposite way. He is all smiles and confused looks as he registers all the people in this group and the white girl with the camera…what the? He then takes one look at our leader, Skikuku, and he starts to cry. He hasn’t seen Shikuku for years! and here they are…meeting on the same path that 10 young men and women are walking in order to process a more peaceful country. It is so profound that I am tearing up just remembering it. We stand and talk with him for a little while, and then we continue our walk…He stumbles over his feet as he watches with his teary eyes as we walk on. He can’t believe his eyes. This forest is full of old friends just waiting to meet each other.

Isn’t that just life?

One step at a time until you meet someone who reminds you of the better person you are inside…

One step at a time until you run into something that shakes your soul….

One step at a time along the elephant paths until it converges with things that make you cry from the passion of it all…

One step at a time.

To be continued…

xo.

P.S…..

I am looking for a place to hang all of these photos…a place for them to live for a little while…a place where their elephant of paths can converge with others. And also a place where people can see them and can choose to care, or not. It’s always a choice.

BUT if you know of a place, you have a place, or you want to help find a place…

MESSAGE ME. Let’s get these out there and on their way!

XO.

Before I launch into Kenyan memories and adventures… Can I...

Mon, 13 Feb 2012 20:30:00 -0900

Before I launch into Kenyan memories and adventures…

Can I just say that I love how every other brown bag of groceries has a bouquet of flowers poking out of the top? I love it.

I adore it because I can just see the face of the receiver of those flowers…”ooohhh!!! Flowers?!!!!” I just love that.

Happy day of love lovers. Even if you aren’t in a N.Sparks novel-esque life…it’s still a day to tell someone, anyone, that you love them…SO GET ON IT! And don’t forget to love yourself while you are at it. Can’t love anyone else the way they deserve if you aren’t loving yourself 110% the right way!

Kenya…Part 4.

Out into the bush we go…but in order to get there we gotta get in the Matatu….(if the word Matatu makes you go “huh?”…refer back to the last post…then continue reading this one. xo!)

And the matatu is a little like riding a bucking bronco with 14 other people. It’s intense.

Fact: While I was in Kenya it went from the dry season to the super duper rainy season. Result: Our matatu got stuck…a lot.

Fact: These kids have NEVER pushed a car out of the mud in their lives.
Result: The adventure started WWWAAAAYYYY before we got into the wild.

Fact: We put on gators.
Result: We needed them.

Fact: If there is one thing Kenyans do NOT skimp on…it’s meals. They eat three, if not four, meals a day even if it is not within the hours that they normally would.
Result: Even if your Matatu has broken down because of it’s second “puncture”… SOMEONE finds a bag of snacks and passes them around. In this case it was a plastic bag filled to the brim with fried dough that resembled thick doughnuts.

Fact: We got to Robert’s boma in time for another snack and dinner right before the rains swept in.
Result: We all jumped into Robert’s guest boma and watched the rain…no one said anything…silent bonding. Boma aroma. It’s all becoming so so real.

So, sometimes I have dreams and they leave me with a feeling in the morning that is so distinct that I carry it with me for a few days. This had happened a couple months before I went to Kenya, I had dreamt of a place where things were the light only came in one window and the ceiling was low. The place was warm with a slice of chill. It came in waves of wonder and courage. I felt confident and safe and it felt like people who knew me better than I knew myself had been here just before me. I felt like I was home even though I had never seen this place before.

I woke up feeling like I had just gotten a tight hug from everyone I have ever missed in my life. Like I had just left a pair of my shoes in a place where I belonged.

And then I met that place in real life. and I took a picture of it.

I was sitting in Robert’s boma…and all of a sudden…I started crying. I had been here before…this was my dream. This was from my dream.

I had found my way back to the shoes that I had left there in my dreams.

Dreams of a Kenyan boma.

To be continued…

Kenya…Part 3. 11.25.11 “This country and it’s...

Mon, 06 Feb 2012 14:05:06 -0900

Kenya…Part 3.

11.25.11

“This country and it’s people are so friendly! And the smiles?! Ohmy the smiles…they have perfect teeth! So their smiles are bright white, beautiful reflections of how excited they are to see you.

Amazing.

When we get to the villa we start to talk more, start to gravitate to each other, and we begin to settle into our skins a little bit. We are here, no turning back now.

The musician has prepared me so well for this trip that I can just shoot photos and start to introduce myself as more than the strange girl with the camera. I am just one of them…I just know how to pack a pack.”

………………………………….

These first moments of this trip I felt like my eyes couldn’t get any bigger…it was a good thing I had my camera or I might have had a panic attack from not being able to suck in enough of the experience and remember it. I barely wanted to sleep! I wanted to meet everyone, sit in the middle of it all, hear every question and ogle in every answer.

This was maybe the last day that the thought “Maybe I shouldn’t eat that…” occurred to me….because after this day I was thinking “This is the biggest experience of my life…if I get a tummy bug from eating this incredible meal…BRING IT ON!!”

The traffic in the parts of Kenya I was in…are an outrageous adventure!

In Nairobi it’s a little like a race car game of wills and wheels. Intense. I kind of looked forward to it, I loved the jolting and the unknown stopping and speeding. Cars have a job in this country and anything with wheels is a car.

In the Bush of Kenya it is a whole different story. Picture the most intense off-roading you have ever done (Wyoming-ites I am talking to you…you know who you are.)…now take away that fancy jeep or truck that you are doing that off-roading in, replace it with a mini van that needs a good sturdy *SHOVE* to get the door open and closed and the windows sound a little like a symphony of…loudness. These are called Matatus (say it out loud it is such a fantastic word to roll off your tongue.) I got in to one of these when we first started on the PAVED roads and I was a little worried…and then we pulled off onto the dirt roads and that is when it got real. Rivers, boulders, mud, bomas of people watching, giraffes munching, “get out, time to push!”, and so much more…

Whatever that scene looks like in your head….keep going with it…I will post photos of that adventure next time!

Kenya…part 2.1 This was the most mind boggling part of...

Mon, 06 Feb 2012 08:09:26 -0900

Kenya…part 2.1

This was the most mind boggling part of the adventure for me.

This bathroom…..that doubles as a shower.

The shower….that is also the bathroom.

It took me a hot minute to figure out how to wrangle this situation.

You gotta get real serious about what morning activity you are going to do first…serious.

TMI? Welp…there you have it.

See you for round 3!!

Kenya…round 2. From the beginning this trip was a magical...

Mon, 06 Feb 2012 07:57:31 -0900

Kenya…round 2.

From the beginning this trip was a magical express.

I got the text from my mom saying: “We have the money, buy a ticket!”

and I did.

Got the shots (that is a whole nother story!)

Packed with the help of the musician…who also happens to be a NOLS instructor incase you didn’t know!

and got on the plane.

10.5 hours to Amsterdam and another 10 to Nairobi.

…………………………..

Nov.22.11

“A whole row to myself from Portland to Amsterdam! What?! The best trip ever!

A mother with 7 children, alone, while her husband sits in first class. Sometimes you see social constructs that battle your own and the choices lie in the reactions and the opinions moving on word. What are these little daughters learning about their roles in a society. Strong women w/quiet voices.

It’s time but not real time What day is it?

Traveling without the constraints of time is incredible.

I’m feeling a little nervous, I guess this is the time to prove myself…to myself. Handy.”

8 Hours later

“I wonder what my dad’s advice would be about this trip… What would he say about this place? He loved Kenya, and maybe I will feel how much Kenya meant to him when I put my soles on that ground.

Being bold can be tiring.”

11.24.11

“A little jet lagged.

A night of sleep that felt confusing and restless while also dark and deep…a little like this place. Not many frills here, living simply…although, living simply can be a frill of its own…”

11.25.11

“My first meeting with the kids. I sit quietly for a while, futzing with my camera like I have something important to do with it…but all the while gaining the confidence to be the foreign girl with the weird contraption that she wields like a hand shake….

by the time I get brave enough they have checked me out and have decided not to talk to me. Fabulous. I decide to go all RYLA camp councilor on them and start an ice breaker game…I realize how ridiculous this must seem to them as they banter in Swahili and I ask them questions about their fears and excitement in english. They must think I am crazy.

I guess I am.

The bouncy kid who is so curious about what we are all doing comes in and talks to me for a while, he smells like tea and body odor, he stands a little too close…a little unnerving…but then again…what isn’t?

What will happen in the wild spaces to come? Can anyone predict? I have wild spaces in my soul but I want more in my soles!”

………………

I was the white girl with the camera from a state in a country they all see on television…crazy.

They are kids from every county and every tribe in Kenya.

They are the creme de la creme of their school systems and communities.

They are the generation of change. and they know it.

But they all played nicely…like they were going off to camp…off just take in information and then regurgitate it. They had no idea what they were getting into. I had my backpack and boots on…they had suit cases packed with cotton tee’s and school uniforms. This was going to be a life changing few days for them and even the white girl with the camera couldn’t convey how exciting it was going to be.

After a long bus ride to the outside of Maasai land we ended up at a beautiful little villa where we would pack and then set off in the morning…

I would get so nervous and would reach into my pocket to feel the notes that the Musician had hidden in my pockets to reassure me I was okay and confident. And then I would charge my camera batteries (all 15 of them) and crawl under my neon blue mosquito net and close my eyes to see what adventures lay in my dreams…

….to be continued.

Kenya….Part 1. If you want to skip my jibber jabber and...

Sun, 05 Feb 2012 08:31:19 -0900

Kenya….Part 1.

If you want to skip my jibber jabber and you just want the less chatty version of how to help something worth helping and WHY… (“Mei, I don’t have time for a long post about how your life is changed and more brilliant and beautiful…give me the straight facts…because I have a day to get going on!”)…

for example….you want a piece of art and you don’t want a piece of crap art but you don’t have very much in your “buy not crap art” fund….you just want to do a few mouse clicks and have some sign say “THIS IS WHERE YOU PURCHASE CHEAP (because we all know the term “affordable” is just a hoax word for “you are an elitist who wants a good deal but can’t stand the word “cheap”…) ART BY AN ARTIST WHO WILL BE A HUGE DEAL IN A FEW YEARS AND YOU WILL BE THE LUCKY ONE WHO OWNED A PIECE FROM THE VERY BEGINNING!”….

then let me be your sign…

You want to make a difference in the world? You want to make a difference to a program that is actually making a difference and isn’t just padding their nice custom tailored pockets? You want to see some results? Better yet, you want to FEEL some results? You don’t have a lot in your “make a damn difference” fund (I don’t either if you want to know the whole truth…my fund has about $20 in it and some times it goes to the nice lady who served me my coffee and some times it goes to saving for my college loans. Making a difference is relative and as fluid as unset jello.) You want it to be easy and fast because you have things to do today?

Go here ….. http://janampeacebuilding.org ….. and put in your two cents on making a difference in the world.

Seriously.

But if you want to be talked into WHY you should? You want to see the photos and feel the heat of Kenya on your cheeks, you want to know the people and you want to see the look of fierce change they have on their faces, you want to believe, you want to cry a little (go ahead, make it happen, I go to sad movies alone just to cry sometimes…it’s no secret that we all need to make it happen some times. It’s okay), you want the change to come in through your front door to sit down in your living room and to drink some chai with you?

No problem.

Let me make that happen for you!

Stay tuned for part 2….(It will come later today, it’s called building anticipation! I gotta make sure you are excited to hear about Kenya in a way you have never heard about it before!!! So get pumped, get a cup of tea, and settle in…I’m going to bring my A game for this next round.)

xo.

I just found this on my desktop. and it makes me miss my people...

Sat, 04 Feb 2012 10:26:46 -0900

I just found this on my desktop.

and it makes me miss my people and my little fluffy pawed.

I went to the movies today. Just me and a bag of popcorn. I...

Wed, 01 Feb 2012 20:23:00 -0900

I went to the movies today.

Just me and a bag of popcorn.

I sat in the dark of the theatre and sobbed to the story in Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close.

The movie was a reminder on the journeys in life that we didn’t even choose. The life story that we never even wanted. The burdens of learning that life is an adventure and some parts of adventures…include huge thunderstorms of YUCK and we didn’t pack out YUCK stomping boots.

I sobbed all while shoveling popcorn into my mouth.

It was incredible.

I feel like those moments where you find yourself looking up in the sky and saying…”BUT I DIDN’T CHOOSE THIS!! I DIDN’T DREAM THIS UP! I HAD OTHER PLANS!”…are the ones where we find some yuck boots in places we never thought we would. We become artists, lovers, singers, parents, responsible, children, more hopeful, more open…we become slices of ourselves that we didn’t even know were missing.

But that doesn’t mean it isn’t hard!

GAH! It’s so hard to face it! So hard to just sit still and let it happen.

In the movie the line that got me the most was:

“And even though I had heavy boots…I went anyways.”

Lacing those heavy boots and getting ready to stand up straight again is where the insecurity lays…that moment is when we second guess ourselves and feel uncomfortable… because we don’t like heavy boots! We like dancing shoes with lots of shine!

Do you have a heavy boots moment? Do you have heavy boots on right now?

I remember having heavy shoes on a night when I felt like my life was being ripped out of my finger tips…I laid in my bestfriend’s arms and screamed in a voice that only grief can trigger…and then I put on my heavy boots and met the next day head on. And now my heavy boots live in my soul…and I open the door every once in a while and remember….then I go and get some popcorn and take myself to the theatre to spend some time in the dark.

Cheers to the heavy boots we didn’t choose.

xo.

Photo

Tue, 31 Jan 2012 20:38:37 -0900

“We hate the rain when it fills up our shoes. But we love...

Fri, 27 Jan 2012 11:06:19 -0900

“We hate the rain when it fills up our shoes.

But we love it when it washes our cars.”

Friday. Todo lists are slowly being done. Music is...

Fri, 27 Jan 2012 09:37:00 -0900

Friday.

Todo lists are slowly being done.

Music is playing.

Light (something I appreciate more and more the less I encounter sun in the Portland gray) is streaming in my windows.

Work is being done.

And my brain started thinking so early this morning…about what I want to write about today…

……………………………………………………………………………

This week held three days of birth for three amazing people in my life…

A, J, and W…all of whom I wish lived closer to me and who I wish a whole new year of “yeehaw!”s and “WOOHOO!”s!!

W is my little brother…William Morgan. My little brother by 4 years.

and he is fantastic. but one of the things that he teaches me most is steadfastness.

He is a 19 year old with a 800 year old mind (a hopeful, open, wise and kind 800 year old mind…not a “wow that is sumthin’ reeeeaaaallll old” kinda mind.)

He and I have traveled the same roads but we have come out being fantasticly different people.

He is quiet and thoughtful…I tend to talk before I have a thought-full of anything.

He solves problems with a mind that seems like he has shelves and shelves of knowledge to pull from…I wing it. (One time my boyfriend broke up with me in junior high and I spent the first night just SOBBING in W’s room…I was obviously full of middle school social drama grief…and W’s reaction to this whole scene was to draw pictures of unnamed heart breaker falling off a cliff. The drawing was of course very beautifully composed and labeled. Ha!)

He stands up tall and hugs with all his might…I hug with all the mushy gushy energy I can muster.

He remembers people in the most kind and beautiful ways…I hope we are alike in this way…

He is tall…I am short.

He is in Calc 467563827292 and I was thrilled to pass Geometry and the Imagination.

But it is because of those differences and more that I am so excited for certain things in our lives. Moments that haven’t even happened yet that are already my favorite all time moments!

We are under one major understanding…and it could be the best deal that has ever been made for me…the best thing I have ever gotten for free…the best gift…ever…

We are each others biggest fan and we will always be here. He is my only brother and I am his only sister. We are a team. We are Willy and Mei.

So, to Willy! Happy birthweek sweet friend and brother! I love you!

- M.

…………………………………………………………………………………….

I have been working really hard on a bundle of different photos. Art store opening, African adventure with Janam Peace, senior photos, engagement photos, design projects, my up coming website, and also ones like above…that were just because!

It makes me hope that a little of all of those things seeps into all the others. I hope they are all cross pollinating and leaving love notes for each other! I hope the African hope and hospitality gets in and that the love from the engagements sprinkles on over and lets all get some excitement from the seniors embarking off into new worlds and…for the amount of work that art school is…I hope we are all getting something out of it!

Ha!

Hope your weekend is light and wondrous!

xo.

Just a few from a shoot I did this morning of the grand opening...

Wed, 25 Jan 2012 21:11:00 -0900

Just a few from a shoot I did this morning of the grand opening of Portland’s Blick Art…

Too much fun!

The colors were fabulous.

The people it drew in were amazing and such amounts of talent I can’t even imagine what they will create.

The deals were killer!

The president of Blick was standing outside in the rain to give folks waiting Starbucks cards!!

And the floor was a reclaimed high school basketball court! Um! Amazing! I want one in my house.

xo.

The cutting table

Tue, 24 Jan 2012 09:41:18 -0900

The cutting table

Photo

Fri, 20 Jan 2012 19:58:05 -0900

Missing her and her. xo!

Mon, 16 Jan 2012 20:00:23 -0900

Missing her and her.

xo!

Lola.

Sat, 14 Jan 2012 08:25:53 -0900

Lola.

I love Love. Diane and Jordie…June 8th 2012.

Sat, 14 Jan 2012 07:37:42 -0900

I love

Love.

Diane and Jordie…June 8th 2012.

Halves. That word has been swimming around in my life...

Thu, 12 Jan 2012 11:36:58 -0900

Halves.

That word has been swimming around in my life lately.

Missing my other half.

Half and half.

Two halves of a good whole.

The lower half of my body being so sore from swimming with the Lander Boy’s swim team.

This half of my life and that half.

Right brain and left brain.

It’s interesting to see how many “halves” come up in life.

Do they need to be juggled? Or could it just be that they are cut from the same whole and that is just fantastic?

xo.

It’s good to just take a break from the every day and go...

Tue, 10 Jan 2012 12:53:00 -0900

It’s good to just take a break from the every day and go on vacation.

So we did.

Vacation to the hot pools.

The water was the color of aqua marine baubles all collected into a pool and it steamed into the winter air. We were the only ones for a while and we bobbed and squealed from the heat of the raw hot water.

The hot pools have a smell of soul and time just wanting to be spent like quarters in your pockets.

They leave their smell on your skin and when you come back home you remember that hot ice blue you stepped out of. It makes you feel like a million dollars and so connected to the ones who have taken that smell home with them too.

Mom and I got a burger and a shake (from The Shake Shop) and enjoyed every minute of our afternoon vacation.

Our lives are far from boring, our lives are not in need of adventure most of the time…but that doesn’t mean that we don’t need to take a detour every once and a while. A detour to a space where the world wouldn’t expect to see us on a Monday afternoon. A detour just to remind the world that we can switch it up whenever we want, we aren’t scared of change, we aren’t afraid to shed some responsibilities and put on the coats of “doing this for me!”….

Take a detour. Bring the vacation smell home with you.

xo.